i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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