You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
