Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
