who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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