it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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