I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
She's the barista slut.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
