I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
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