To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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