he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
