I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I queefed so loud it echoed.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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