I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize