i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize