Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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