ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
