i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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