A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
