your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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