Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
