Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
