It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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