I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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