Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
