hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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