just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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