Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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