There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
