Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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