The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize