Ketchup is God's man juice
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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