She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
