Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I think people are normalizing furries
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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