Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
