I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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