Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
The Olympian is in my bed
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
