if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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