Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I don't want my vagina anymore.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize