I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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