The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
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