Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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