I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
