i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
ugly people sure do ruin things
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
