sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
