Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
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