Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
