He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
and you fell through a lawn chair
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize