Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
