Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize