I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
