I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Randomize
