You really coming over, don't trick.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
